Tests and changes

So, here I sit on the couch for the start of the second week in a row. I'm still under Dr orders not to do much and a 10 pound weight limit really slows me down. By they way, he (the Doc) called me directly to check on me 1 week post op. I had my 'lap' (exploratory surgery) done last week and I don't think I've ever had anything kick my butt the way this has. I feel like the only time Rodney sees me is when I'm making permanent butt prints on the couch. About the only saving grace is that while he's at work I can get laundry done and in a very slow manner I manage to get the floor swept and mopped. Thank God the rest of the house pretty much stays clean, thanks to the help of the kids. I don't know that we have ever been attacked so much as the way that I feel that we have here lately. We aren't dispairing or letting it get us down. We are totally taking it in stride. We lost Rodney last night for about 20 minutes and then he came in all sweaty and nasty. He had gone on a run. It seems that he is not wanting to go through his foot surgery and now he's wondering if maybe he doesn't just need to lose some weight and if that will make a difference in what is going on with him. So, now he's wanting to try running every night and losing some weight and eating differently. I have to say, he may be onto something. We BOTH enjoy eating, we can't help it and when the food tastes so good, what do you do.

So, if he winds up NOT having his foot surgery, then he wants me to go ahead and have my partial hysterectomy, immediately. Not something I am looking forward too, but tough, it needs to happen. I've gone back and forth thinking about this for quite a while and I always swore that I wouldn't do it and that is just what happens when I swear, I wind up doing what I swore I wouldn't do anyway.

I think I'm just a little un nerved because so much has seemed to happen in this small little family in such a short period of time. Rachel took a nose-dive, mentally, Garett was and is still having problems with his joints and his eye still, Rodney and his foot which is directly linked to his job and then I seem to be falling apart, as a woman. The only one of us that is ok is Anthony and then that makes me nervous, because I'm afraid he will be directly attacked. I know all things happen for a reason and I've beleived this all of my life, but it still makes a person not comfortable.

I just got back from Garett's appointment with the Retina Specialist today and I just can't help but be irritated. No, not at the Dr. He was wonderful and just as baffled as we are by what is going on with this kid. What I am irritated about is just the rough road he has had to go down. Some of it by his doing and some my own. Part of me just wants to scream & shout, ENOUGH ALREADY!!! But a fat lot of good that would do. Here's what's going on the best we can tell. In 2006 we discovered that he was having major eye problems. He was always seeming to rub at his eyes and wouldn't stop and we couldn't see anything in them. Then we noticed that he was doing things like shooting and aiming for long distance things with his left eye and he's right handed. So, we took him in for a routine eye exam, since his last one was questionable, we thought for sure he was going to need glasses this time. Not only did he need glasses, but he also needed to go see a retina specialist because they found his retina tearing away. They did surgery, got rid of the floaters and repaired his eye. No big deal, we just made sure that nothing happened to him, trauma wise. Fast forward to our move to Florida. Garett comes home from school one day saying that his floaters are back and they have a LOT of company. So we go through the song and dance of regular Dr appt to get a referal to an ophthamologist who in turns refers us to ANOTHER retina specialist. Who in turn tells us that his retina is still good, but there is some major inflammation there and needs to be watched for a while. So we have 2 sets of eye drops that must be put in his eye (right only) 4 times a day to get the swelling down and allow his eyesight to return to normal. None of this is the problem, I am just rolling with the punches.

What is the problem is when we get in the car and head back to town and Garett looks at me and asks if there is a college in Cleburne. (The town we used to live in before coming back into the military) I tell him there is a Jr College and ask if he's thinging about going back there after high school. He says yes and that he also thinks that the military will be out of the question. Here is the part where I just totally get lit up. Garett thinks there is too much going on with his body and it's not cooperating and he needs to find an alternate plan for his future. The part where I am lit up is that I see my baby, my child's special dream of going into the military and being an active part of our armed forces, something that he has wanted to do for most ALL of his life, go down the proverbial toilet!!!!!!! Can you feel my pain? Part of me wants to scream and shout (the unruley side of me) and the other part of me wants to squeeze him till his head pops off because he's so smart and mature (obviously more than I am right now) to recognize what is in front of him and push forward and through it. Here's a REAL kick in the pants. When I ask him what he wants to do, he replies that he thought about being a youth leader or preacher somewhere. (See my point on what I wanted to do to him!!!) Yes, I did manage to keep it together because I would have just mortified him if I would have acted any differently or even CONSIDERED shedding a tear. I obviously have one hell of a kid!!!

Poor Garett had always been labeled the trouble child or the problem child and for all of this to come out of him in a single 10 minute conversation, well, I'm just sitting here shaking my head. He is something special all right!!!!! So right now, we wait...and wait. The next 6 weeks will not be his favorite, because he hates having things dropped into his eyes, but that's the way it goes. On another note with him, we are watching him for Marphan Syndrome. He seems to be exhibiting most of the symptoms of it. We have to get the eye thing taken care of and continue watching his knee because we are still having issues with it and then we will have to get him in to take a look at his heart and the aeorta (sp). I'm hoping this is the worse, but I'm also a realist.